Self Respect...

Having newly begun the professional phase of my life, a question has been nagging at me ceaselessly. It concerns not just a few select individuals about to begin their post academic career or folks appearing for their interviews… it could also be asked by virtually every student, and every employee in the world. It’s a simple question really… whose answer may have a lot to say about who you are and how you’ll fare. The question is something straight out of almost all self help manuals… “How do you look at people?”

When being groomed for the upcoming job interviews by our professors, almost every one of their advice seemed to deal with how one should present himself at the time of our placement. From how to dress and how to sit… to how to speak and how to say in a hundred ways that we don’t know the answer to what we are being asked, all of our actions and responses needed to be bound with politeness and deference. It was a good bit of advice if ever there was any… unless you have a problem with authority.

Deference and respect are fine things that every single one of our fellow men is deserving of… but humility to the point of servitude is a rather different case. While there is no reason to not be polite to your interviewer, I doubt if approaching the interview with the thought that you were beholden to him in some inexplicable way, can be considered healthy.

Sure, he is the one with the power to select or reject you… sure, he is the one who will grant you the job or kick you out, sure he holds the key to your prospective livelihood… but does he not need you at all?

You need him for your paycheck... and he needs you to get the job done. You need him for your job and he needs you to be his employee. Does that not shine some light on the fact that even this is a give and take relationship slightly different than that of a beggar and the man with the change?

I disagree with the psychology that says the only way to approach an interview is to feel that the interviewer is all powerful and you should do your best to please him. If that’s how you feel you are setting yourself up for a life time of servitude and being trodden on by your peers. It is essential for your own self respect to recognize your own value in any situation. Even after the interview is over and you have been awarded the position you wanted, you must bear in mind that your boss is not the be all and end all of your existence. Professionally his experience and know how should dictate your work, but beyond that you are both equals who need each other and are both just as indispensible.

It would perhaps do the world a lot of good if people remembered this simple fact both before and after they themselves become the bosses. It’s ok to instruct your subordinate on how he should carry out his professional responsibilities… but it isn’t fine to mistake him for your personal man servant as if slavery was still in practice. Perhaps it would do well to occasionally remember that age old quote that all men were in fact born equal.

If applied to other spheres of life, this logic would seem appropriate to even schools and colleges. While students must bear in mind that their teachers know their academics much better than them, they should not forget that it doesn’t justify them being treated like pawns to be summoned and dismissed on the whims of their masters. Ultimately, in any educational institute whatsoever, it’s the student’s fees, which pays for the teacher’s employment. So considering this example of equality, or at least a mutual need, should there not exist a fragment of respect that works both ways?

Food for thought folks… on how you look on your social superiors and those that are proverbially ‘beneath’ you. Just food for thought.