Sanity...

Lonely in the night as the darkness beckons,

I sit listless and count the seconds,

That tick by slowly while my breathing slows,

As I dive into a world that no one knows.

Every night’s ritual this, my sordid game,

Far from a life of fear and blame,

I choose to hide in the shadows and dark,

Afraid of light and hope’s frail spark.

I desire no company, I revel in gloom,

In my soul… for none there is room,

Except for me… my master and guide,

The one from whom I have nothing to hide.

And this is my world, inside my mind…

I have built a utopia, and to this I bind,

My conscience, lest again it be hurt

In the world of men, of desert and dirt

Solitude is blessed, in my house and head

I desire no flesh that would warm my bed,

My world is free from plots and schemes,

I no longer crave, those passionate dreams

I had my fill, of both light and laugh

But this is it, for the remaining half,

Of my life, or what is left to be,

I would spend thinking of no one but me.

After such lengths of time and toil,

All I have gained is pain and turmoil,

And so this old geezer, weary of life,

Hides all alone avoiding all strife

Inside my head I have everything I need,

Beautiful peace… for which so many bleed,

I don’t want the outside, to ravish my world,

So perfect and frail, and around be curled.

All the pain and sorrow, has perished here

In a world of one, there is nothing to fear,

There is no confusion over society’s norms,

There are no threats, no sudden storms.

Recluse though I may be, to the world outside,

From within, it’s a fortress where I abide,

I am the master and I am the lord,

Of a tiny realm where sanity is stored.